


A Night of Hope

by Flor_of_Desert



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternative Perspective, Drama & Romance, F/M, Light Angst, Mirkwood, Slow Romance, what happened at the elven's dungeons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-12 10:41:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29383632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flor_of_Desert/pseuds/Flor_of_Desert
Summary: Kili decided to focus on the important things in the solicitude of his cell.He make promises, demands attention and finds love - not in that order but he isn't complaining, after all, his imprisonment in Thranduil's dungeons could've been much worse.
Relationships: Kíli & Thorin Oakenshield, Kíli (Tolkien)/Tauriel (Hobbit Movies), Legolas Greenleaf & Tauriel
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	A Night of Hope

**Author's Note:**

> I thank my dear friend from high school that wrote this wonderful fic with me - it was her idea and plot, I was just along for the ride. I would add her as a co-creator but she doesn't have an account here. 
> 
> Enjoy!

In the journey to the Lonely Mountain, while trying to escape the Orcs, the dwarves were caught by the Elves, being taken to Mirkwood as prisoners, that palace was nothing like Rivendell, where they spent the night, accompanied by Gandalf, many months before.

The architecture was everything one could expect from beings that lived surrounded by dense forest. With trees so high and full of thick leaves, shadows were the norm during the days and almost no natural warm light from the sun could reach the grounds and nights so dark that one must've been a native to venture outside even with touchers. 

The palace was perfectly built to integrate the surroundings. Its colors outside were pending pastel tons. Doors were made of wook, a dark brown beautifully carved and polished, standing impotent and tall. Inside, the colors followed a grayer pattern, although Kili wasn't sure if his eyes were playing a trick of light or if he really saw a faint, ethereal glow on the walls. 

Their long journey home to reconquer Erebor was taking longer than expected and Kili could feel his uncle, Thorin, starting to become more rashly towards the company, insisting on traveling faster and not being too cautious with their path. 

_This situation could've been avoided._ Kili thought to himself, in the loneliness of his dark cell. 

Down there, there was nothing to do besides rest and sleep, and although after so many weeks after fighting and running from Orcs, that rest was needed by the company, it had cost their freedom and precious time, which they didn’t have to spend, but he was, admittedly, impressed with the palace, the brief parts he had seen on his way to being shoved down here. 

Kili didn’t remember how Erebor looked like, majestic and imposing, glorious even - full of riches and high walls made of sculpted stone. He suspected that even after all the desolation, it would be an impressive sight to behold, he knew only the stories about the old days of the glory of the Lonely Mountain, and could only remember flashes of his childhood, and the horror of running away shortly after Smaug appeared. 

After seeing Mirkwood and imaging it on its golden days, without the illness and shadows in the trees and its inhabitants, Kili would admit that it was a truly beautiful place, with a touch of magic, perhaps even ethereal he dared to think. 

As the prince, he couldn’t voice those thoughts out loud, he only could wish in secret that he would live to a time where his people and the elves could have relations again and maybe, if the dwarves weren’t so busy admiring their rocks and gold they could learn to appreciate beauty in other races and their makings. 

It would've been a nice place to rest if the elves hadn't captured them, and Thorin wasn't being difficult and wary of king Thranduil. Kili understood why his uncle was abstaining his comments and refusing to answer plainly the questions made at them. As blunt as dwarves were, he knew Thorin was trying to not reveal his purposes because of his resentment towards the king who, in times of need, refused to give aid to dwarves at the occasion of Smaug. And knowing the elves, they would detain them for an eternity to not cause any troubles with the dragon - it could not even be alive but the possibility alone of disturbing peace and bringing tragic consequences near their kingdom was sufficient to assure them a life sentence in these dungeons.

Unfortunately for all of them, not giving answers seemed to only enrage Thranduil and they were thrown in the dungeons, mercilessly, again and again, waiting for a miracle or a change of mind on behalf of one of the kings. Kili hated the situation they found themselves in but he would never betray his uncle by taking a different approach. If his king wouldn’t talk, neither would he. And he was sure all of the others would prefer to die first than to disobey the example settled by Thorin.

Above all, there was the matter of Bilbo who was trying to find a way out for them. Having been lost in the forest and separated from them in the attack of the gigantic spiders, the hobbit was giving his best to explore all without being seen and report to Thorin and the rest of the company. They were relying on him after all - Mahal knew Thorin wouldn’t get them freed with his incredible art in diplomacy.

It was a good thing that the hobbit always seemed to be behind wherever they found themselves captured or ambushed. Kili still doesn't know what to make of this. For one side, Bilbo had the chance to escape on multiple occasions, to deflect and give up easily on his contract with the company, to contact Gandalf or to discreetly examine the security of the place and find a way to free them all. But as a dwarf himself, to not be captured with your company could be seen as an act of defect. For now, his options were to trust Bilbo Baggins and wait, neither much appreciated but required all the same.

-.-

Kili decided to focus on the important things in the solicitude of his cell. He was separated from his brother and alone while the others were grouped in two. His uncle was nowhere to be seen though most of the day, being interrogated for long hours and coming back to his cell only at night time. Straining his ears, he could hear his friends talking among themselves quietly trying to evaluate the situation and judging the risks while plotting an escape with the information the hobbit brought daily. 

He also evaluated the possibilities, but couldn't really make any good of his current situation, totally apart from the others, he couldn’t exchange ideas as for the position of his cell was too long for Bilbo to make the route many times so he had to contempt himself with only the reports of their progress and whatever decisions they might take. Deciding that he should wait made his days go by in a tedious routine.   
That was until one night while watching the dust swirl in the ray of starlight, close to his cell, he saw her again, stepping closer, probably doing rounds to guard the prisoners. 

In an instant, he had an idea: she might be the key to their freedom and any information he could possibly acquire may come in handy.

For his misfortune she seemed as determined as him: she would simply ignore any words that would come her way, acting like he wasn't even there. After many tries, and seeing how stubborn and serious about her work she was, he started to do the same by habit, both ignoring each other and the only time he ever caught a glimpse of her green eyes upon his, was when he was trying to sleep and she was beginning her rounds. 

But Kili wasn’t aware that in this strange routine, he grew accustomed to her nightly shifts. The floors of the dungeons were made of a cold beige stone that made loud footsteps sounds when people walked by, and with every sound, Kili started to hope that she would appear again, on her guard duty. He really didn't know why, but she seemed to be less cold and distant, almost not wary. It seemed that she had too become familiar with his presence. 

She was the only elf that was not bothered by their presence - well at least his. Kili couldn’t say the same treatment was given to the others judging by the harsh words exchanged sometimes. Her company, although silent, became the most exciting part of his days, apart from the occasional visits from the hobbit. 

After spending so many hours alone, sleeping in a dark room with cold floors, it seemed like, for a moment he could forget about the serious situation they were in, while gazing upon her green eyes. 

Strange how a few days in captivity could make one change their feelings towards others. Their interactions, if one could call it that, held a strange tension though. None of the guards down there ever approached them, spoke or made visual contact unless to intimidate. But she was different. From then on he would caught her staring, a pensive look in her features, not disgusted like the others of her kind. If Kili was feeling imaginative enough, he could almost pretend it was a look of curiosity directed towards him, the same look they exchanged in the forest. 

He was preparing for one more night of a restless sleep and suddenly felt something in his pockets, a familiar weight, making memories rise in his mind. His hands travelled before his mind understood what was happening, guided by his desire to feel some deep connection to someone, he reached for it.

He was remembering the times where they were camping, with the moon high on the sky and the songs by the fire warmed his heart. His mind flooded with the memory, he touched the stone, he almost forgot about his talisma, his lips involuntarily opening in a smile, a genuine and innocent one and he realised he had not smiled for what seemed like years - or just the side effect of spending to much time in the company of his uncle, he mused. Kili started to play with the small dark stone in his hands, carved with runes, in its inscriptions the promise he had made to his mother, a symbol that was supposed to bring him home safely.

Kili was so distracted by it and deep in thought that when he looked up to the noise he heard, he met her eyes. 

-.- 

In this particularly cold night, no one was guarding the prisonaires, all the guards had been laid off duty, and the dwarfs were left alone in their cells. Kili could hear the echo of elves talking, walking - having a celebration of some sort above them, but didn’t know what was the occasion.

Around midnight when the stars were shining their brightest through the columns of the fortress, only _she_ showed up. 

Tonight though she wore a look that reflected his own - if not a bit more troubled. He had been there, in those days when he'd received the cold side of those creatures, the resistant to extremes of nature, ruthless, yet graceful elves, but he could now tell their eyes told a different story from their actions. None more than hers. 

He wondered if being head of the Mirkwood Elven guard was as solitary as she made it seem. It was true he had observed her, he watched the blond elf talk to her at a number of occasions but she seemed to not return the meaningful looks he gave her. Making Kili wonder if the stories his mom told him and his brother were true, and if it was the same for every living being, even those who lived eternally such as elves. 

If so, Kili concluded that the blond elf would have to live forever destined to see his love being unrequited by the guard. That thought made Kili more than homesick, and he longed for something he couldn't name as he had not experienced before. The emptiness in his chest resonated through the night. As young as he was for a dwarf, he knew his chances of finding what could fill his heart with happiness were scarce, more so on this journey, knowing a dragon was waiting for them, he forbade himself to look for anything that wasn't related to their mission.

Kili said good night, and as always she had no answer. He then started to throw his talismã on the wall for it to bounce back, and he would do it again as to pass the time since he hated the thought of the elves celebrating upstairs while he was stuck in his cell, waiting for his life to go right past him.

As for Tauriel, the elf was only trying to hide from Legolas that day and she wasn't really supposed to be down there, but the celebration reminded her of something she never knew how to deal with, the complicated sentiments between her and Legolas, making her afraid of ever telling him the truth. She then went to do what she knew best at the moment, her job, but that was proving to be quite a challenge, for her prisoner was making an annoying noise, instead of only giving an invitation for a talk, he kept throwing something at the wall, disturbing her mess of thoughts and vanishing her patience.

“You know… if you kept quiet the time would go by faster.” She said somewhat keeping her scolding out of her voice.

“If the time went by faster, I would have less time to look at you.” Kili replied without missing a heartbeat. He almost regretted it immediately for her expression passed from blank to annoyed in mere instants.

She looked at him with a furious look on her face, and went back to ignore him, looking at the other cells, he smirked to himself, he finally made her say something. He kept throwing the talisma back in the wall, the noise echoing throughout the dungeon.

“Kili, would you stop that! You will drive us all mad.” Thorin's voice above them carried on in an angry tone. 

“Maybe you should listen to him.” The elf said, neutral. 

Kili decided to seize the opportunity to change the subject. 

“Tell me why aren't you up there celebrating? If I annoy you so much, you could always leave - the other guards left and we could hardly escape from these cells.” He told her, then added, “I know it's probably not a good old dwarvish Durin’s Day, but I am sure it's something.” 

She looked surprised. She couldn't believe he was comparing a simple new year dwarf celebration to what they were celebrating that day. Only a dwarf could be so offensive with or without intent. Judging by his intonation she was quite certain he was simply aiming for a conversation. Well she wouldn't give the satisfaction of replying even if this little creature was interesting enough, offending her people's costumes was her drawing line. 

Kili waited for a response that never came. That was nothing new except for her face, closed and guarded not directed towards him anymore. He was so engrossed trying to convey her looks that he forgot to continue his distraction with his talisman much for the satisfaction of the rest of the company. 

Then clarity came to him after her silence. He had offended her. His first response to that any other day would be to ignore or throw more insults for dwarves and elves didn't get along. Instead, he found himself not wanting to offend this one. A strange feeling in his belly took place, similar to the one of their first meeting in the forest. Kili decided to comply and use his manners as the prince he was educated to be. 

"I meant down here we haven't much entertainment to offer but up there seems to be good laughs and enjoyment." 

It wasn't an apology for dwarves rarely made one, but his voice carried sentiment and she seemed to understand his meaning. Her expression relaxed but she remained silent, perhaps not wanting to dwell on the subject. Kili decided to try his luck one last time.

"I see you constantly but never had the privilege to know your name." He said. "I'm Kili, son of Dís." Deciding to leave his title aside, he introduced himself.

"Tauriel." She told him simply. 

Kili smiled. He didn't know what else he could say that didn't involve the celebration above them or his situation behind bars. He decided to follow his feelings and say whatever his thoughts were.

"You fight with grace, Tauriel." He heard murmurs of laughs from the other cells but didn't let it stop him from continuing. "Tell me, are you always requested to fight those creatures?" 

“I am the head of the Greenwood Elven guard.” She said in a monotonous tone hoping that it would answer his question.

“You are a skilled fighter, although I don't trust your strategy skill”, said Kili, staring into her eyes. He walked close to his cell gate, and put his hands outside of the bars, while resting his head on the wall.

Tauriel thought that to be a charming position. And immediately reprimanded herself.

“How come?'' Said Tauriel, amused by his comment.

“If I were the head of the Mirkwood Elven guard, I would have waited for my soldiers before entering a fight.” He answered in a quiet voice.

He was referring to the fight with the spiders, from earlier that week, when they first gaze eyes upon each other. She could tell there was sincerity in his voice, and the quiet tone he used was made so only she could hear it, which was kind considering he could have yelled that clever line so his cellmates would hear him, but purposefully did not. She didn't know what to think of that.

Tauriel stepped closer to his cell, wanting to look into his eyes. Her emotions were conflicted, having always treated other creatures the way she was taught - and she was aware of the prejudices she let cloud her vision - never without regret, but right now she felt ashamed. Sure he was not to be trusted, he was a stranger to her, but he was clearly helpless at that particular moment, and she concluded that the only reason she acted that way, was because of her pride.

“But I forgive you, if you hadn't saved me I wouldnt have the chance to see your eyes by the starlights.” Kili continued saying while smirking playfully.

Kili observed attentively for her reception of his comment. He was always throwing charms and flirting, usually receiving teasing comments or amused laughs. The only exasperated responses he ever got were the ones of his uncle - who was eternally serious and focused and often found his attempts at fun unfit for the situations they've found themselves in. 

To his surprise, he got a very different reaction from the one he was expecting. Tauriel seemed taken aback by his forwardness. Her eyes lowered to the floor for a second while her mind debated what would be the best course of action. She looked, for a stranger's eyes, unaffected. But he knew better. Elves were hardly susceptive to color on their cheeks. But if one is looking for signs, as was Kili, they could've been seen plainly. Her breath was shallow for a second and she was lingering on her stare at the floor. 

Kili was more shocked however to notice his own reaction to hers. He could feel a pleasant sensation in his body, warmly enveloping him, a sense of childish delight in having made her like this - of causing such disturbance in her composed persona.

"Do you always say words like these so carelessly?" Tauriel inquired. She would not play a game as this one with a dwarf she knew nothing about.

"Only if they're the truth." 

She stared intensely at him, analyzing his expressions carefully. Kili let his face reveal all. He wasn't joking with her, only curious about his sentiments regarding this beautiful elf who was his captor. He held no other intentions.

"You should be more cautious." She advised, her face turning into an impassive mask.

"Why would I?" He was tired of people, especially his uncle telling him this. He knew he was an open book and as a prince he shouldn’t be. Politics could leave devastating consequences in people like him, carefree. It was considered a weakness. 

Kili did not consider it so. To be such an easy person to read, to expose his feelings was not a weakness, it was the most strength one could show - few were courageous enough to dare to be open and unguarded. Even with the odds being of getting hurt by others, he would not hide. People could always use a little more faith in the world and an honest face would always be the first step to that. 

"You say things as someone who cares his heart on his hands would."

"Is that such a bad way of living?" 

She hesitated.

"Your affections could be crushed and you would be left devastated." 

"I wouldn't care." Kili stated confidently.

"Why wouldn't you? A heartache sometimes lasts a lifetime."

"Then I would know it was worthy. A lifetime of confirmation that my feelings were real. That I had found my _one_ , even in pain, it would bring me joy to see them happy. Their happiness would be my contempt and I would gladly suffer if it meant their delight in a content life." 

Tauriel was aware of his people as he was of hers. They choose a partner for life. Dwarves called them the one. Having found your one, you would never fall for anyone else, whatever the circumstances that could separate both apart - death, unrequired affections. Elves were similar in many aspects if not more sensitive, in some cases, when in death of a mate, slowly fading, leaving behind eternal life.

She kept silent and Kili turned back to his distraction with his mother's talisma, hearing sounds of displeasure from the company. He missed the wall and the rock took the route outside of his cell. Tauriel was nowhere in sight, she had quickly left, having gone to inspect other places. He would wait for her to ask for his talisma back.

-.- 

"What is this?" 

He was startled by her voice. Kili hadn't meant to fall asleep. He wondered how much had gone by, and he saw Tauriel standing holding his precious talima in her hands.

"It's a talisma, my mother's gift." He told her. "It means my promise to her that I would come back to her again."

"And how's that working for you?" 

He almost snapped at her. But then Kili realized she wasn't being mean, she was teasing. Although hesitantly, Tauriel was teasing him. She held the stone in her hands carefully inspecting the runes. 

"Well," he said, knowing two could play this game, "she'll forgive me for being late, I'm sure of it."

"Is that so?" She smiled.

"Of course, when I tell her of my exquisite captor and her beauty, she'll understand my tardiness."

This time, a pale, delicate rosy flushed Tauriel's face. Kili was delighted. 

"I will mention to her about how I was treated with kindness even when I well know about the prejudices that our races hold against each other." 

"Do you think she would like your tellings?" She asked while an involuntary smile appeared on her lips.

"Yes", he said, "and she would be mad at me for not introducing the brave warrior who spends her time with me even knowing we are enemies by her king's word."

Kili conveyed his feelings in a few words hoping his hidden meaning would be understood. He could never, not when others of his company were listening, not when his uncle was listening, tell this beautiful elf about how she was different from every opinion he was taught to have about her kind.

He was aware of his prejudices against her, having made a poor judgement instead of waiting to know her personality. Kili thought her to be beautiful, kind and above all, he had a feeling that her soul was wise as for her eyes conveyed the glow of the moon. 

She was resilient and strong as an elf but didn't let it make her cold.

And suddenly Kili found himself attracted to her good natured humor, her so subtle quirk of lips and her rose cheeks.

_Oh Mahal._

_What have I put myself into?_

Sensing his uneasy, Tauriel changed the course of their conversation. 

"Your mother sounds like a good dwarf woman. My own parents passed away before I was old enough to miss them." 

"I'm sorry to hear that." He said surprised. She still had the rock and now her eyes seemed distant and sad.

‘"The king took care of me since I was friends with his son." 

"Legolas." Kili concluded.

"Yes." And now things started to make sense. The pieces were forming an image in his mind and her hesitancy to be at a party seemed more reasonable. 

"It's beautiful," she finally said after a moment of reflection, handling his talisman back. 

Kili extended his hand to take it from her, a light brush of palms against each other. He didn't feel any different, and there weren't shivers on his body as he had heard others describing. There was instead a feeling of familiarity, of completude in their touch. 

He felt the warmth it brought him. Tauriel's touch was soft even if her hands were calloused - unlike his own, rough from the work he had to do to help his people. 

In an urge to know if he wasn't alone in his feelings, he raised his eyes to hers shyly. She was slightly pink, her soulful eyes glistening with understanding and, he dared to think, hope. A naked trust to not corrupt this new feeling, to guide them towards more.

She was baring herself for him and Kili was greedy to look and discover. He wanted every single thing she offered and in return he wanted to comfort and hold her in his arms, even if he knew she was as strong as he, he wanted to treasure her with all his being.

Just like that he knew deep in his heart, in his soul, that he had found in her his one.

Tauriel felt the warmth of Killi’s hands on her own, and she thought it would be a cold touch, but she was surprised to find it to be warm and comforting, she could spend hours like that.   
She looked up to find him staring at her with a familiar look she saw before, he had a blush in his cheeks, making his expression boyish and younger - it was how Legolas would stare at her, but how she felt towards Kili was very different and not unwelcome like with the other elf. 

She stepped back letting go of his hands and felt scared. What was happening?

“Why do you stare at me?” 

“I think you know.” Said Kili smiling. He kept his gaze on her for longer than what she felt comfortable with.

She broke the eye contact looking at the floor, but her lips twitched upwards involuntarily.

“I don’t think I do.”

They had let go of each other and taken a few steps back and Kili reached for her hand through the bars of his cell. He tried to touch her and Tauriel stepped closer to him sitting at the stairs close to his cell. She touched his left hand with both of hers as his right one was still holding the talisma.

“Would you stay here tonight?” Kili asked.

Tauriel was about to answer, but her sensitive hearing heard footsteps, someone was getting closer. Kili noticed her distressed look and quickly slipped his talisma on her hands making her look puzzled. She quickly stood up, trying to give it back to him, but he gave a few steps back, sitting on his bed.

“That way you'll have to come back to me right away.”

Tauriel was surprised, she knew what that stone ment to him, and felt a great responsibility bringing it back.

"I'll return it to you." She promised.

Kili smiled. His talisma was a promise and it, more than that, had brought him his _one_. 

-.- 

Tauriel climbed the stairs trying to see who was getting closer but saw no one. She surely was not imagining things. The elf found herself in the center of the party and looked around. Everything was so different there, the noises, music, food, elves laughing...but the only place she wanted to be at the moment was downstairs looking at Kili's dark and romantic eyes.

She suddenly grabbed a glass of wine, trying to compose herself. Only a few moments had passed and she already missed him. She would get to the bottom of that - someone could have heard their conversation, and it could be dangerous for them. The elf decided to stay at the celebration so she could not raise suspicions. She started to use her keener hearing to try to identify footsteps. To her surprise, she looked up to find Legolas staring at her. 

Tauriel realised at that moment why those footsteps were actually very familiar. She crossed the room to him.

“My lord Legolas.” 

“You finally joined the party, I almost thought you were on duty, I barely saw you all night.” He said an easy smirk playing on his lips.

“I guess I'm more comfortable doing my job than having fun at celebrations.” 

“That's why you probably fight so well.” Said Legolas, his tone serious. But Tauriel knew him better than that and saw right through him and his light teasing.

It was almost the same compliment Kili gave her earlier, but not only did she think it was senseless, she cringed at those words. Legolas continued talking without noticing or pretending not to. For the last century comments like these were more frequently directed to her. 

Tauriel muted his voice and maintained a neutral face, ignoring his pleasant talk. But her mind was paying enough attention to him to hear the last part.

“Maybe instead of having to keep watch on the prisoners we should transfer them, somewhere where they stay even further from the mountain.” Legolas finished, smiling viciously.

It felt painful. The worst part was that she didn't know if he was doing it on purpose, or if he was being his normal self. Deciding to not raise suspicion, she tried to play along since she had not bothered to hear the entire monologue. 

“That would be very amusing.” Tauriel responded, a forced smile on her lips, trying her best to hide her emotions.

She noticed at that moment she was still holding the stone in her hands, and started to hold tight to it. She quickly finished the wine in her cup, not pacing her manners, leaving Legolas astonished by how fast she drank. 

“I'll get some more.” She said, turning her back to him, desperate to have a moment alone to gather her thoughts. 

Legolas grabbed her elbow delicately as she turned to leave, making her head turn to him. He looked lost for words, and was again giving her the look she longed to escape from. She stared at him, but whatever he was going to say he didn't have the nerve to do it, so he let her arm go.

“Would you bring me some as well?” He said pointing to his cup.

“Yes my lord.” Tauriel said in a formal tone.

Tauriel felt conflicted as she went to fetch the wine, Legolas could at his command send the prisoners away at any moment. Could she just go and free them before all this happened? Yes. But would she do this? Betray her own kind for someone she barely knew? 

She was certain she felt something for Kili, but was that the right choice to make? Besides, she was only starting to know him but knew nothing of his companions. Could she trust them all? 

She realised she was taking too long with her thoughts, soom Legolas would notice her absence. 

She could not make a decision so lightly, it was like all of her strategy skills were clouded. Tauriel chose to get more wine so she would have more time to think, but as she went downstairs she felt Kili’s talisma weight in her pockets, making her heart beat fast, her thoughts an incoherent mess. 

She went right past Kili in his cell on the way down to the cellar, but didn't stop to talk, not even glancing at him. Tauriel didn't see the puzzled look on his face. 

She returned to Legolas with two barrels much to the happiness of the elves. They surrounded the barrels quickly, making Tauriel step back, getting closer to Legolas and she let out a deep breath she didn't know she was holding.

“May I speak to you?" He asked.

“Sure.” She answered, trying to compose herself.

Legolas signed to the balcony nearby, where there were no other elves and less noise, the light of a crescent moon shone upon them as they entered, and at that moment Tauriel’s thoughts seemed to calm. She looked at the forest outside and felt at peace, placing her hands at the carved handrail and waiting for what the elf prince had to say. 

“Tauriel be honest.” Legolas spoke in a supplicant tone while standing beside her.

As Legolas' feelings grew for Tauriel through the centuries, she distanced herself from him. If that situation had happened three hundred years before, she would have told him everything - shared her thoughts and feelings, letting him make his judgment of her. She would be confident he would have accepted the both of them, maybe even help her, but it had been so long since she could trust someone like that, especially because talking to him involved hurting his feelings. 

Tauriel felt without allies at that moment because she felt the person she could trust was behind bars and not beside her.

“After all these years, you really think I could stand in the way of your happiness?” She heard Legolas saying with a calm voice. She turned to look at him and raised her eyes to his face. 

For the first time in centuries, Tauriel really looked at her friend. She was surprised with what she found in him, his eyes showed grief and a deep concern. She forgot somewhere in the passage of time, that this elf was more than her friend, he had become a brother to her. How could she have been so blind to not notice the hurt she was causing to him? 

Legolas made his way to her, standing by her side closely.

“My lord, I...” Tauriel tried to say but fear was taking over her. She couldn't forgive herself for her actions but did not know how to repair the damage she had made.

Legolas understood. He always did. Even when she thought herself alone, he was silently there guarding her.

“I have this memory from when I was a boy”, he told her instead. "I was running around with a bow and arrow, when my hearing found a heartbeat.” 

Legolas kept looking at the forest with a small grin on his face.

“It was my mother’s, she was talking to my father." And Tauriel could imagine him trying to get closer to them without being noticed. "They talked in whispers so others could not hear them." He paused.

"That's one of the few memories I have of her, and also one of my fondest.” He had a lost look on his eyes, his grin turning sad. “That's why I can’t do this to you, don't become like me, be with him.”

“You could hear my heart?” Asked Tauriel, trying to understand his meaning.

“I could hear his.” Legolas answered.

She smiled and a tear ran down her face. All her doubts had disappeared and she wished she could just be with Kili and give herself to him. She hugged Legolas and felt that trust she had lost for him return, and sadly she could feel his heart beating strongly. 

“But I am afraid I can't let him go.” Legolas finished.

She understood him as well as the risk a crown prince couldn't take, even for the sake of his loved one. All of this because, as she remembered bitterly, of old prejudices between elves and dwarves of the Lonely Mountain.

-.- 

_The story was old but elves of Mirkwood were all aware of this almost ancient secret, of the queen’s sacrifice, Legolas' own mother, the late queen._

_She had a gift, she could see into the future. One night she had a vision of a dragon coming. She did not know when, but moved by fear, she took the kingdom's most precious jewelry as far away as she could in the hope of saving her people from the threat._

_She brought it to the Lonely Mountain, buried it deep in the caverns, hoping the distance would mean peace to the elves. In her journey back she was attacked by orcs and died in battle, since then, the elves of Mirkwood had been ruled by a king moved by grief._

_The stone that would be found many centuries later would be called Arkenstone. And the prisoners on their dungeons were descendants of past dwarves' kings whose symbol of power used to be the same stone._

-.-

“I know you want to make him proud brother, I too take pride in serving my people.” She told him firmly. The elf stepped back to touch his chest and see his face. “But the king forgets that jewelry was not the only thing she left him, she also left him a son.” With that Tauriel walked away. 

-.-

Meanwhile inside his cell, Kili worried for Tauriel. He was so preoccupied that the sound of laughing was a strange surprise. It echoed through the cells loudly. 

_What were they laughing at?_ , he thought.

"What's the fun?" He asked.

"Oh, finally out of the dream world." Filí said.

"That elve didn't seduce you, did she?" Balin asked.

"Ha! She did!" Oin said, "Look at his face, he believed her!"

He was ready to reply and declare vehemently his love, reminding them that he was a prince of the lineage of Durin and they should show him some respect but he saw his uncle's stare pointed at him, carefully regarding his movements.

His fellows could mock him as they always did, but this time he couldn't forget that and act in a reckless manner towards them to not raise suspicions. Above all, he should be even more cautious with his behavior from now on because of his uncle's judgment, after all he was his uncle's heir.

Even with certain liberties, his uncle would never allow them to declare feelings for the enemy. That would be more than crossing a line - Thorin would consider the act a treason and he would be disgraced and dishonored, never allowed to see his mother again. He would be abandoned by the company and he would have to escape on his own, seeking exile nowhere near his uncle's kingdom. 

Kili wanted to avoid that. He knew he could not change the ideas of the dwarves rapidly, especially his uncle’s, towards a better relationship with the elves, but given time, he was certain he could make his friends see more than the prejudices between their races taught them.

And that was the matter: time. He didn't have enough time. Not now, not in the foreseeable future. 

_Mahal, what would he do?_

Besides, there was Tauriel herself. She never made any promises regarding them. She did promise to return his talisma. But now, reflecting on their brief time together, he wasn't sure anymore if she felt the same. And there was the fact that she passed through him at large passes and didn't even glance at him.

What should he think of it? 

His heart beat loudly in his chest, sure of its convictions. Sure of his _one_. But his mind warned him, urged him to not fall for things that were not even promised. 

He decided to not answer them, keeping to himself. Kili was sure the emotions would wave his voice and give away what he was not ready to reveal. However he did look at his uncle.

Thorin seemed older in his cell, more lines on his face, a permanent frown in his expression since their captivity. Kili knew he was worried for the hobbit, Bilbo, for they haven't seen him in the last two days. Was he dead? Had the elves captured him? 

In that moment Kili realized that perhaps his uncle cared more for Bilbo than he let on. 

Wait. 

Since when his uncle became concerned about the hobbit?

_Oh._

Maybe he wasn't the only one among them with secrets of his own.

But even then, having feelings for a hobbit was infinitely better than feelings for an elf, Kili thought defeated. Unless -

Well, maybe - an enormous maybe - Bilbo could in due time help him to change his uncle's mind. Bilbo was fond of the elves and he had a way with Thorin to make him more...soft.

That could work. But then he still had two problems: where was Bilbo and what did Tauriel really felt for him.

The first he was incapable of solving. Even if not, he knew his uncle would already have searched the entire kingdom of the elves for Bilbo. 

The second was partially his problem. He couldn't change Tauriel's feelings but he could declare his to her in hope to - 

To what exactly he didn't know. A future with her? Would he even have a future? He was heading to a mountain to steal and kill a dragon. Was he even going to be alive after that?

_Why in Mahal's name was love so complicated?_

Love.

_Oh._

He was screwed in the worst possible way. There was no turning back from this. Once his mind let this word cross his thoughts it became all he could think about.

Kili needed to focus. He would declare himself to Tauriel, regardless of her response, he would have no regrets - he was after all in a suicide mission and maybe he would not be graced with another opportunity.

It was decided then, when she returned, he would speak his heart out. 

-.-

It was on the darkest hour that she returned. Kili was wide awake in his cell. 

"How was the celebration?" Kili asked, not knowing what else he could've said to start a conversation.

"Good." Tauriel responded. She hesitated, then added, "enlightly."

They talked in whispers to avoid waking the others. 

"I brought it back to you." She kneeled and extended her hand into his cell.

Once again, the touch was comforting for Kili's heart and his hesitation to speak almost vanished completely.

He didn't let her hand go. He held her lightly, the stone between their palms. Kili looked into her eyes, and was surprised she didn't let go of his hands either, she was staring right back at him.

“I missed you.” Said Killi, as he got closer to the bars still holding Tauriel's hand.

“I was looking at the stars one minute ago, and was thinking about what you said about me.” She said, referring to the compliment Kili had given her earlie, “And I was wondering, how do you do it?”

“How do I do what?” Said Kili puzzled.

“Say things so freely.” Tauriel wanted to declare her feelings but was new to saying exactly what was on her mind, which made it difficult, the words didn't seem to flow as well as Kili’s did.

That comment made Kili smile. He liked that the things he said had an effect on Tauriel. That he could affect her.

Kili decided to avoid her question and changed the subject, looking up at the light. “You know down here it feels like only the starlights can reach us.” He paused. “But the stars for me always seem like a cold light, remote and far away.” 

“I have walked there sometimes. Beyond the forest and up into the night. I have seen the world fall away and the white light of stars filled the air.” Said Tauriel, feeling Kili’s gaze upon her while she looked up the same direction he had.

“Maybe in other circumstances we could be under the stars together." He wondered aloud. Then in a moment of free wish Kili allowed himself to offer what was not his.

"We should see the stars under the Lonely Mountain. My uncle always told me stories when I was a wee lad of the beauty of the sky at night, of how they seemed to dance on the walls of the castle. I wish I could show you.”

“The thought of you going back home just makes me feel like I will never see you again.” Said Tauriel being honest about her feelings.

Kili was taken by surprise at that comment, he thought the Lonely Mountain to be something he had to concur or maybe die for it, nothing more and the timing couldn't be worse for the both of them, so he was willing to spend every second he could with Tauriel. Having her referring to that place as a home, was the only time he allowed himself to think of a future where he could return to her.

“Tauriel…” He continued “There is always a crisis, perhaps you should consider living your life during them otherwise you might miss it.” He said gazing at her, desperate for her understanding.

He let go of her hand, surprising her a little. She would've asked what was wrong but then she felt the delicate touch on her face. Shy and slightly trembling, Kili's hand touched her cheek, just the tip of his fingers. He carefully took a curl of her hair as if afraid that this moment was just a product of his imagination. Her hair was soft, smooth and beautiful. For a second, Kili was invaded by the thought of giving her a bead and braiding her hair should she have accepted his courting. 

He was distracted by it but soon returned to present, and he found her eyes observing him. 

Tauriel was lost for words, there was a lot she wished to say, but didn't know how. His eyes seemed full of emotion, he stared at her with such an intensity. She sincerely hoped that she could convey in actions what words failed her to expose. 

Tauriel stepped closer and closed her eyes, placing her hands in the bars next to the ones he was himself on, and placed her forehead against his.

“Amrâlimê…” He murmured against her skin, closing his eyes, feeling her head against his.

“Tell me what do you mean by that?” Tauriel asked gently, pulling her face away, and opening her eyes, feeling Kili place one of his hands in her chin. He slipped his fingers, brushing them against her hair again, still fascinated with it. She wanted him to confess his feelings to her more than she could say.

“Please.” Tauriel added softly.

“Tauriel, my affections for you have not changed. I would not dare you to defy your people by releasing me so we could be together. But if I could ever have you, I would never regret choosing you over my people after I conquer the lonely mountain.” Kili confessed plainly. He bared his heart and there was no turning back, the only thing that could discourage him was Tauriel now. 

She blushed and Kili could feel her cheek becoming warm next to his hand. She said nothing but did not seem aversed, quite the opposite. 

“What do you mean by leaving your people? Would your relatives not accept you?” She changed the focus and asked with curiosity.

“My uncle would probably banish me?” Kili simply said. His tone was insecure.

“Your uncle?” Tauriel didn't understand his meaning.

“Thorin Oakenshield.” 

Tauriel was taken back by this information, so Kili wasn't just an ordinary dwarf among his people like herself, who was just a capitan in her guard, she did not have a title, but that made her know Kili definitely understood her commitment to her people.

“So, you would be king of the mountain if it ever came to it?” Asked Tauriel, trying to understand Kili’s position.

“After my brother Fili, yes. But between you and me? I don't think the day will ever come to pass.” Said Kili playfully.

Deciding to be more comfortable, he sitted of the floor, and Tauriel did the same sitting in front of him.

“So do I have any hope? Or have I presumed too much?” Kili questioned in a suplicant tone, reaching for her hand.

“I would trust you with all the time you have to offer me.” She said resting her hand upon his. “And if that's not enough, I shall trust you with the rest of mine.” She added to her promise. 

Her referring to giving time to Kili made him apprehensive and he remembered that if ever was too badly hurt in battle and passed away, she would fade as elves tended to when separated from their mates. Although poetic, that thought brought pain to his heart because he knew the dangers that awaited for them on their journey.

Tauriel dared to reach for his face and gently touched it, feeling the warmth of his skin as she gazed at him, making him close his eyes briefly then smile, forgetting the pain and concentrating on the present. 

He took hold of her hands and placed it upon his chest so she could feel his heart beating.

Not aware of their movements, the two drew closer, touching their heads and breathing the same air. Kili closed his eyes first and Tauriel soon closed hers too.

They stayed like that for a while not concerned about who might see them. Neither of them knew who crossed the distance between them but both poured their souls in the kiss that soon followed. 

It tasted like joy and sadness, a promise for the future they might never have and exciting all the same. When they parted, there were smiles on their lips and hearts beat together in unison for the first time.

-.-

The two lovers thought everyone else would be sleeping or not hearing them and didn't worry as young love tended to be. 

However above them a dwarve was very much awake at that moment, laying on the cold floor of his cell, staring at the dark ceiling, thinking if he would ever have the chance and courage to say the same thing to the object of his affection.

Thorin could not really understand his nephew’s wishes of being with an elf, even more so after such a terrible history with them, but he thought he could at least not stand in his way, for one day he would require the same of him.

-.-

It was almost day and the first signs of light started to appear in the palace. They knew it was time to part. 

Kili wanted to pretend that they would see each other again the next night but he knew this hour would be the best to escape and that Bilbo had already planned and passed it to them, even if the hobbit was missing they would have to hope for the best. The elven defenses would be the least alert after an entire night of banquets and wine. He didn't want to, but he had to part ways with Tauriel. He had to send her away. 

His next action was an impulsive one. But then again this whole night was being impulsive even for his standards of troublemaker. 

Kili placed his hands in his hair and took his bead, undoing the braid. He had nothing else to offer and he was aware that he couldn't make promises of a future with her. But he could give her this - a symbol of a wish, that in another life he would choose her first, that he would court her properly and give her everything to see her happiness. He would give her this for they could not meet again and he had to leave knowing he lived without regrets.

"I can't make promises Tauriel." He said. "But I can wish. And I wished we had met in different circumstances, that we had more time. I wished to know you, to court you the way you deserve. That our people weren't enemies and we were free to love."

"But I can't change any of that. Instead I choose to live my life the fullest and take the moments of happiness and treasure them in my heart."

"Tauriel, you are my happiness. I don't know you yet, maybe I never will but I know in my soul you are my _one_. I shall never love another."

"But I can't stay with you. Not now. Maybe never." Kili said, his voice sad and resigned. "If time won't be kind to us, I have to make the most of it with what's been given to us. And while I can't do many things for you, I _can_ give you my heart." And he placed in her hands his bead with Durin's symbol crossed by an arrow - his name, his first bead that he received when he was of age. Then, like a promise between two lovers, he whispered to her his most deep desire.

"Would you wear my bead, Tauriel?"

And she knew that he wasn't asking about the bead. He asked her of a promise even more deep - her hand, her life, her love, as he was giving her everything he was or would ever be.

She smiled when she answered. Her heart was sure of her decision.

_"Yes."_

-.-

When Bilbo came and freed them, Kili was relieved to be out of his cell and more so to be outside - even with the circumstances of being in a barrel and chased by orcs.

After, when they were recovering, none of the dwarves took notice of his smiles. Of how they didn't carry the blind light of a careless young dwarf. They were genuine but did not reach totally his eyes, somehow a little bittersweet. 

No one except for Thorin.

He called Kili one night after their escape, when the stories about Bilbo's accomplishments had been told and celebrated. They went for a little walk, not too distant but enough for privacy.

"You lost your bead." His uncle said.

"Yes, must've been on the river." Kili lied absently. 

When he didn't speak more nor seemed inclined to continue, Thorin decided to take a direct approach.

"Kili, I know." He said, having stopped walking and turning to his nephew.

_"Oh."_ Kili said, "Uncle, I'm-"

"Do not apologize." Thorin said. "I don't like elves and it is certainly unfortunate enough that you have one as intended."

Kili shrank his shoulders, ready for a lecture.

"However I will not stand between you and your happiness." His uncle finished.

_Wait. What?_

"Uncle, what-?" 

"I will never prevent you from being with your one, Kili." Thorin said. "We do not choose who we love and I don't presume to know the Mahal's will. If she is your one, I shall be happy for you."

Kili had tears of joy in his face. He would never imagine to hear those words coming from his uncle's mouth. A heavy weight he didn’t know he was carrying was lifted from his shoulders.

"Thank you, uncle." He said hugging him. 

Thorin smiled. Maybe he couldn't have the same joy as Kili but he would ensure his nephew had it.

They parted and Kili thanked him again, turning back to return to the camp. He was almost out of site when Thorin spoke again.

"Kili?"

"Yes, uncle?" 

"I may accept her but I'm not sure about meeting her family yet." 

Kili grinned already thinking about reencountering with Tauriel. This time it reached his eyes. And he looked again like the dwarfling Thorin had watched grow all these years, carefree and happy.


End file.
